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Author Topic: Little known facts about penguins  (Read 14774 times)

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Raydar

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Little known facts about penguins
« on: January 13, 2021, 09:34:36 pm »
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica – where do they go? Wonder no more!! It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintain a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.

If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into, and buried. The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:

"Freeze a jolly good fellow." "Freeze a jolly good fellow." Then, they kick him in the ice hole.
...

GTRS Fiero

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #1 on: January 13, 2021, 09:47:51 pm »
Suppose it's a female penguin?

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #2 on: January 14, 2021, 09:21:48 am »
Ouch!

How does a penguin make its house? 

Igloos it together.

Raydar

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #3 on: January 14, 2021, 05:44:48 pm »
Ouch!

How does a penguin make its house? 

Igloos it together.

Touche'  :D
...

scottb

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #4 on: January 14, 2021, 07:12:05 pm »
Yall are getting worseR  :P
« Last Edit: January 14, 2021, 07:35:51 pm by scottb »

GTRS Fiero

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #5 on: January 14, 2021, 07:28:05 pm »
Worse?  WORSE?!  I thought this was better.

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #6 on: January 17, 2021, 08:13:51 am »
Why did the penguin have lots of friends?

Because he was an ice guy.

I'm sorry about that one!

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2021, 11:06:10 am »
How did the penguin pass his driving test?

He winged it.

Not getting any better but am hoping if I keep going one might be useful when FF does his comedy stand up tour.

Fierofool

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2021, 02:32:45 pm »

Not getting any better but am hoping if I keep going one might be useful when FF does his comedy stand up tour.

I don't need dialogue.  All I have to do is stand up in front of a crowd and they start laughing.  They throw money at me and I walk out with my pockets stuffed.  Funny, I never get a return engagement.  I wonder if they're paying me to leave. 

But thanks for the thought and effort. 
« Last Edit: January 22, 2021, 02:36:21 pm by Fierofool »
There are three kinds of men:

1.    The ones that learn by reading.
2.    The few who learn by observation.
3.    The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.    Will Rogers

GTRS Fiero

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2021, 08:03:49 pm »
Next time, sit down in front of a crowd.  It's more difficult to pocket the money, but moore money comes in.

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #10 on: January 25, 2021, 09:22:22 am »

Not getting any better but am hoping if I keep going one might be useful when FF does his comedy stand up tour.

I don't need dialogue.  All I have to do is stand up in front of a crowd and they start laughing.  They throw money at me and I walk out with my pockets stuffed.  Funny, I never get a return engagement.  I wonder if they're paying me to leave. 

But thanks for the thought and effort.

See you can even write a routine about your routine FF. :0)

What do you call a happy penguin?

A pen-grin.

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #11 on: January 31, 2021, 04:07:17 pm »
Why are penguins so good on the internet?

Because they have web feet.

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #12 on: April 04, 2021, 10:48:33 am »
Why are penguins good racing car drivers?

Because they are always in pole position.

GTRS Fiero

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #13 on: April 04, 2021, 10:51:43 am »
Um, that is for the start of the race.  If you finisted the race in the pole position, you would lose.

PK

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Re: Little known facts about penguins
« Reply #14 on: April 05, 2021, 03:38:53 am »
It works because pole position also applies to a leading or dominant position...not just to the initial starting position in a race.

I think it's ready for FFs stand up tour should he choose to use it.
« Last Edit: April 05, 2021, 03:45:24 am by PK »